You can remember the butterfly feelings you felt when you first met your partner—the rush of excitement, the passion, the fun, the romance. You were both happy and couldn’t get enough of each other.
But those memories feel more distant now. You and your partner are stuck. You keep getting caught in the same painful patterns over and over again. And now, these painful patterns make you question if you and your partner are still on the same team. It gets harder and harder to know how they feel and what they need, leaving you wonder if the two of you can ever be close again. You want so much to feel close, connected, and satisfied in your relationship again. You just don’t know how to get there.
In moments of hurt, we need ways to reach our partner, communicate our needs, and repair relational hurts. But, first, we have to understand what is getting in the way. Many of today’s solutions for couples teach couples skills to communicate better instead of addressing the well-worn patterns and emotional undercurrents that cause communication to go off track. Many of the couples I work with need practical tools AND a way to address what’s happening under the surface. Couples therapy can help you develop a more finely tuned map for understanding your partner, communicating better, and finding your way to more mutually satisfying moments.
Specialties
In addition to general couples care, I provide the following specialized services.
Military Couples
Raising children and being a military family is tough. As a military spouse (who has also worked 9 years with military couples and families), I understand the unique challenges that military families face. I work with couples and families who are experiencing difficulties with change or transition, emotional connection, stress, or communication issues. Together, we will strengthen your home base, so, you and your family can grow through the challenges and adventures of military life together.
Parenting Together
Parenting is one of the hardest things we do, and figuring out how to parent together is even harder. If you and your partner need help deciphering the needs of your child(ren) in order to tackle common parenting challenges and increase family harmony, let’s chat. Challenging child behaviors may include difficult child-care/school transitions and child-care/school-related behaviors, tantrums/meltdowns, difficulty connecting with your child, coping with a new sibling, coping with loss, social/peer-related difficulties, shy/withdrawn behaviors, and regression in behaviors. Together, we will explore the delicate dance of attending to child, marital, and self-care needs, so you can be the partner and parent you want to be.
Neurodiverse Relationships
As a couples therapist, I prioritize understanding each partner’s neurotype to help the couple co-create ways of creating a securely functioning unit together. It is important that our partner understands the ways that our brain communicates, thinks, and experiences the world. I strive to create a space where neurodivergent communication and bids for connection are acknowledged and celebrated.